And now we are in November, this is the time of year when television decides to cancel all of its “popular” shows in favor of their second chances. Also, it’s the time of year when video game companies unleash their “Triple A” Titles in the hopes that you buy them as Early Christmas presents. Also, Thanksgiving in the States, with hilarity ensuing.
NOVEMBER 2011
We start of with The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, it’s held every year in New York. Sure it didn’t start this year, but this memorable scene in which beloved television weatherman Al Roker is kidnapped and saved by the Power Rangers Samurai, makes for one of the best things on during Thanksgiving.
In Video Games, We were celebrating birthdays. It was the 10 Year Anniversary of the original X-Box, and to celebrate, a video game was released - Halo: Combat Evolved Anniversary just updated the graphics of the X-box Launch Title and told the same story. It’s bizarre how playing against people in the original Halo sounded like children, now ten years have passed – and they still sound like children. It’s the NeverNeverLand of video games.
And it was the 20th Birthday of Mr. Needlemouse himself, Sonic the Hedgehog. In Sonic Generations, you play as the Classic, Chubby Sonic and the Modern, Obnoxious Sonic as you go through classic levels from various Sonic video games but re-imagined and with more “missions” to complete. Everything you liked about Classic games like Sonic 3 & Knuckles and Everything you hated about Modern Sonic games like Sonic 2006 is in here too.
If you loved Lego Island and Lego Island 2 : Brickster’s Revenger than more than likely you were thrilled with the announcement of Minecraft 1.0 the fresh-out-of-beta build your own adventure game is now available for the PC as well as your iPhone, Android Mobile and everything else that makes no since. If you’ve never played Minecraft and are freaking out over what the fuck is going on, that just means you’re more sophisticated in video games, embrace that while you can.
Yo Bro, did you pick up Call of Duty : Modern Warfare 3 yet? Dude, you’re missing out on the action, bro! Bro, there are guns and grenades and holy shit a plane crash and DUDE YOU FAGGOTS SHOT ME! Dude, we need to play co-op! Dude, don’t be such a faggot, you get the Mountain Dew, I get the Four Loko and we’ll kick up this Modern Warfare 3 Party Bro! Fuck Yeah Dude! Soap is back! Soap?
Ezio is back, this time in Constantinople (or Istanbul, if you like They Might Be Giants or History) finding out his ancestor, Altair. In Assassin’s Creed Revelations, you continue to play as Desmond Miles trying to find out about your ancestor, Ezio trying to find out about his ancestor, Altair. In this concluding part of “The Assassin’s Creed 2: Trilogy”, we finish of Ezio’s storyline and it sets up the stage for Assassin’s Creed 3 in which Desmond finally puts his sleeping in a chair that tracks his ancestor’s DNA to good use.
Uncharted 3 : Drake’s Deception is a beautiful game, and arguably one of the most fun titles you can have on your Playstation. Nathan Drake is back, his shirt half-tucked and his five o’clock shadow looking better than ever. Even if you call this “Tomb Raider with a Guy”, it’s still a well playing game that puts you in the middle of another Indiana Jones adventure. Plus, Subway Advertising!
It’s game of the year according to so many developers, but what makes The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim so exciting isn’t the hours upon hours of missions you can do in the game or the wide variety of customization, or the fact that enemies respawn in the game so you’ll never “finish” the game off. No, it’s actually the fact that it’s a Single Player experience that makes it the most exciting. In a gaming world with DLC packs, Online Co-op and Multiplayer Matches, it’s amazing how a game decided to not even bother putting it in the game, and instead focused on having the best Single Player experience you can have all year.
F0r Nintendo Wii owners who aren’t privileged to own an Xbox 360, a Playstation 3 or PC capable of playing Skyrim, they were stuck playing The Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword look at the gaming innovation as you are swinging the wiimote across the screen, look at how beautiful the game is. In Skyrim Sword, you… Sorry, I’m still distracted by Skyrim, those battles with dragons beat any battle against like-likes and Ganondorf any day…
People are looking at Saints Row : The Third as just a Grand Theft Auto clone. Please don’t look at it that way, if GTA was “Godfather”, Saints Row would be “Mafia!”, but actually fun to watch. GTA makes the game “serious” by having it be a dilemma about good versus evil, only sprinkling on a few comic reliefs in the form of the radio stations and the stores. Saints Row never takes itself seriously and instead gives you almost all the fun things right at the start of the game, with only more fun things unlocked as the story progresses and more insane shit you do in Stillwater. It’s one of my favorite games all year, I can’t put it down. I must play Professor Genki’s Super Ethical Reality Climax one more time…
Speaking of Movies, Tower Heist, that was a movie. Couldn’t tell you the genre, but it’s a movie.
Time for the cliche Arthouse Movie of the Month – My Week with Marilyn tells the story about a Director’s 3rd Assistant as he works on the classic Laurence Olivier movie “The Prince and the Showgirl” starring Marilyn Monroe. The “week” begins when Monroe’s husband, Arthur Miller leaves England and returns home to America. It’s a Drama, it’s a Biopic, it’s a ton of things. Plus, there was a movie within a movie. The only problem being the woman playing Marilyn Monroe was Heath Ledger’s girlfriend, Michelle Williams. She was a fantastic actress in the movie, but she did not look like Marilyn. To be fair, we weren’t expecting to find an actor who resembles Elvis Presley for the Elvis biopic either.
Some may argue that The Artist has the worst dialogue in any movie in the last thirty years of cinema, I disagree. The dialogue is fantastic and the words spoken throughout this movie are some of the best in modern time, even if it is a silent movie. The Artist deals with 1920s Hollywood actors dealing with the change from “Silent Films” to “Talkies” in addition to celebrity gossip and the introduction to the paparazzi. Very Compelling.
And if you’re a moron who watches cinema simply because “the actor is pretty cute”, then luckily Twilight : Breaking Dawn Part 1 might be your kind of movie. All you have to do is sit there and mope while Bella mopes and act like an Anime Fangirl meeting Vic Mignogna whenever Edward or Jacob appear on the screen. The major problem with these movies is the fact that although they’ve probably already read the books, the movies are trying to be released at a fast pace in order to not make audiences “grow out of them”. Even though just about every channel now has to have something involving vampires, werewolves or other movie monsters. Whatever happened to Blackula?
Hey everybody The Muppets are back! Kermit, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, Fonzie Bear and a dozen other muppets have returned and they haven’t aged one bit. The movie centers around, you guessed it, The Muppets as they try and revive their careers and the muppet theater from the evil “Tex Richman”. This movie was so controversial it actually caused Fox News during a slow news day to make it “a big deal“. TAKE THAT OCCUPY WALL STREET!
And finally, THE FUNNIEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR 2011 JACK AND JILL Get ready to LMFAO at Adam Sandler playing an Advertising Executive and Adam Sandler playing the Jewish Sounding Sister in a hilarious laugh-out-loud comedy! If that doesn’t make your sides split because of the thought of those two sharing a place together, wait til you meet the co-star Mr. Al Pacino! Your pants will be wet when you discover that he has a crush on Jill, and Jack wants to use him for his advertising campaign! What zanyness is going to happen in 2011′s Dunkin Donuts Comedy of The Year Dunkin Donuts? Well I am not going to tell you because it will be like explaining the jokes to the world’s funniest joke that you’ve never heard. Get ready to LOL with Jack and Jill!
Wait, Jack and Jill was funnier then Bucky Larson?
Come on dude, you can’t compare Sonic Generation’s 3D gameplay to Sonic 2006′s. They’re completely different in that the former is actually fun.